Can you remember a time when you thought someone was downright awful?
All the while you knew you were “dead right” about him or her until something actually changed your mind about that person at a later time? What was responsible for your change in attitude toward that person? Which thought was accurate? Do you remember how you might have been thinking about yourself before and after you changed your mind?
This concept not only applies to the way things are or the way they happen, and it not only applies to other people, it applies to you too. In theory, the thoughts you have about yourself are no different from the thoughts you have about anything or anyone else in the sense that they create your reality about who you are. But there is one major difference in the thinking you do about yourself — your thinking about yourself is the true source of your esteem and determines whether it is self-dependent or other-dependent.
For example, let’s assume it is accurate to say that you are a magnificent musician. However, you don’t think so. It doesn’t matter that you have superb musical abilities, nor does it matter that others see you as a brilliant musician. You undermine your own abilities with self-doubt and create your own reality that you are a mediocre or poor musician. The converse can be true as well. You may think you are a magnificent musician, but the truth may be that you are a mediocre or poor musician. You might just be a legend in your own mind. Either way, it is your thinking that makes it real for you.
Begin to pay attention to the thoughts you are having about yourself. What kind of thoughts are you thinking about you? Make a list.