Have you ever noticed that when you need to be liked by others you will even put the needs of people you don’t even like before your own and then become resentful because you did it?
How many times have you loaned money to someone you really didn’t want to loan money to – money you were pretty sure you might not get back and that you actually needed to pay your own bills – because you just couldn’t say no? And how mad were you that they had the nerve to ask you for it?
How often do you pretend to like someone to their face, even helping them when helping them is hurting you, and then gossip about them behind their backs afterwards?
Here’s the deal. They have a right to ask for all of your water and you have a right to say no. But as you and I both know, it’s almost impossible to say no when you have such a great need for approval from others. You probably even worry about what others will think of you if this person tells them that you refused to help them when they needed it. You surely don’t want to risk that, do you?
The need for approval from others is one big trap.
Some of us put others first because we’ve been convinced by society that we would be thought of as selfish if we were to put ourselves before others. For those of us who worry about what others think of us, we will put others wants and need before ours even when it hurts us to do it so that others will see us as a good person.
