Although most of us have heard of self-esteem, few have heard of this distinction between other-dependent esteem and self-dependent esteem. Including therapists!
While most therapists, counselors, teachers, and other professionals have thought they were focused on building self esteem, they have typically been focused on building other-dependent esteem without realizing it.
We have been promoting the wrong thing without knowing it! That explains why most of society is relying on someone or something outside of themselves to have any kind of esteem at all— most of us are getting professional assistance in doing so!
Current research indicates that only somewhere between ten and fifteen percent of our society has what is commonly referred to as high self-esteem. The astounding discovery that what we call self-esteem is actually other-dependent esteem explains why so few have it. Almost no one knows what real self-esteem is, nor do they know how to have it. As a result, it eludes almost everyone who seeks it. Those who think they have it, usually don’t. As you undoubtedly know, it’s almost impossible to acquire something when you don’t know what it is or how to get it.
Anyone without self-dependent esteem knows how crucial it is to be getting plenty of other-dependent esteem. At least you have a reason to feel good about yourself for a little while. But what happens when there is no self-dependent esteem and no other-dependent esteem either? This is the perfect recipe for disaster!
What is your idea of self-esteem right? Write it down so you can compare it with any changes that occur in your idea of self-esteem as you move forward. Start your discovery with a free chapter of Good With Me by signing in below.
