The acceptance of “it is what it is” is the exact opposite of the need to control the outcome of everything. In modern jargon “it is what it is” means that we accept things for the way they really are.
Acceptance of this concept puts an end to your resistance to life. It puts an end to the struggle and the bad times. Even self-dependent individuals may not always like every circumstance that occurs, but they know and accept that it is what it is. For example, we may not always like the way we said something, but we said it the way we said it. Acceptance that it is what it is gives us inner happiness. Very simply, happiness is the acceptance of what is.
Since everything is just what it is, why not accept it? This is not to suggest that acceptance means liking or even condoning our circumstances.
It simply means accepting things the way they are so that we can do something about changing them if we desire to do so.
What you resist persists. Most of us don’t understand that what we resist not only persists, it gets bigger. In other words the more you resist “it is what it is,” the more it refuses to go away and the larger it becomes. This concept has to do with the universal law of attraction. You actually attract more of what you are resisting because it becomes your dominant thought. Remember, thinking makes it so!
For example, if you fear the loss of your relationship partner, you will behave in a way that pushes her away. You might become very needy, insecure, jealous, and even spiteful. As a result of your unattractive behavior, you will make what you fear happen. You will push her away.
Acceptance of “it is what it is” puts an end to our resistance of the way things really are. How do you accept something or someone you greatly dislike? How exactly do you accept something you despise without giving in to it or giving up your convictions?
Quite simply, you accept that which you can’t change or control.